Thursday, February 13, 2014

Bandits


  1. Heated theological debate. Chaplain Anthem (drawl and long, coin-threaded hair): the goddess delights in us more than other men, for our evil creates space for her mercy. Heavy-conscienced pocked Erluth opposes: Anthem blasphemes; the goddess is too pure to look on us; she will dance with spiked slippers on our backs forever, but still we must worship her. ~R: invite comment by party; +2R if religious PC holds forth. After holding forth, +R = swayed to PC side, are cool w/P. W: (1d6: 1 Anthem kills Erluth; 2-3 Anthem brutally escalates; 4-5 Erluth brutally escalates; 6: Erluth kills Anthem). Others swayed to side of winner. 
  2. Real talk. Muscular metro Charltham finally "talking about it": I trusted her, and that's how she repays me, with him! P knows one/both. W: goes on 2t, crying 6r in. Bandits stay for the whole thing. Supportive chaps.
  3. Locker room talk. Absolutely vile recounting of Kurzen's conquests. P knows one/more of the girls. Obscenity to the max. The guys all yucking it up except one, weedy fellow Wilton.
  4.  Confession. Handsome pierced Vilmar giddy about his attraction to gang leader Theral. W: others convince Vilmar to go for it; they giggle when he leaves.
  5. Philosophical debate. Are possible worlds real? What does that even mean? Smoking sophisticate Hithen insists they are real and necessary for modal statements. Drunk growling Mycon retorts: if it's not nominalism, it's nonsense. W: they yell, are restrained, and go off to appeal to boss. 
  6. Sparring. Nervous gangly Earbald learning spear + shield from imposing stoic Ulima. W: rough session, not much talent, but Ulima encourages him. Ulima giving him more tips as they walk off. 
  7. Target practice. Knives/bows/whatever. Huge Mirren and sarcastic Harful evenly matched, escalate to increasingly complicated trick shots. When you can't think of any more, niceguy Spears steps in front of Mirren's shot, gravely wounded. Mirren devastated, panicking. If P offers aid, +R.
  8. Racing. Pregame trash talk 6r; then Birlog the ref counts down from 6, whistles to signal begin!
  9. Rehearsal. Orations in meter ("For what offense to gods or men / Do I stand here to be condemned / By such a dirty, stupid lot / Which soon, I hope, shall be forgot?"). Preparing for a play (The Trial of Anaximander) for boss's pleasure tonight. W: timid bearded Halfar forgets his lines for the third time, collapses. Does anyone else remember? No. If P is willing to help in the play, +R, plus monetary reward on successful performance. Any cultured PC will know the play.
  10. Maintenance. Oiling/sharpening murder-stuff. Infan insists on the efficacy of some absurd method of birth control; Marther insists Infan has never even done it once. Marther is correct. W: come to blows; Marther wins w/single knockout punch. Scattered applause. 
  11. Excretion. Smiley Wilverford wants to talk business; Carver says man I don't understand you don't be talking right now you always do this. Wilverford says why waste time, what else are we gonna do? etc.  
  12. Sleepwalking. You'll hear them before you see them. All are sleepwalking. It's the purple fuzzy etalubmanmos (eh-TAL-ub-MAN-muss) fungus growing here that does it. Yelling joyous nonsense.